10 Things Nobody Told Me About Pregnancy
1. Nobody told me that my areolas would grow to the size of helicopter landing pads.
2.Nobody told me how my feet would become the size of Sasquatch’s and never return to their previous size.
3.Nobody told me that I may question my choice to have a baby. Don’t judge me.
4.Nobody told me that morning sickness is really “morning, noon and night sickness.”
5.Nobody told me that I would be so constipated at times that I would miss important social functions.
6.Nobody told me that I would need an army of people to get off a couch. And the toilet.
7.Nobody told me that my heartburn would be so bad that I would throw up in my mouth several times a day.
8.Nobody told me that my belly would get so big, I could no longer see my privates.
9.Nobody told me that I would crave foods that I don’t even like.
10.Nobody told me how fatigued, smelly and gassy I would be. Sexy huh?
All this did not deter me… I have 3 kids. What do you wish people would have told you about pregnancy?
I wish I would have known how irrational I would be. I was terrible. I cried. I couldn’t poop, which made me cry more.
So funny! Despite all those things, I loved pregnancy! My feet did grow a solid half size though so many of my shoes no longer fit haha. Pregnancy is weird, but amazing!!
These are all so true (and I’m with you, working on #4!)
I wish I would have known how exhausting growing a baby would be and how I would wake up every morning after a full-nights sleep ready to go back to bed!
But it’s all worth it when you feel your little one sloshing around and get to hear their tiny little heartbeat!
A great post. Your motion pics were awesome! And it’s as I suspected, I had a very easy pregnancy.
SO TRUE. My feet are still half a size bigger even after eight years. and ohhhh, the fatigue. Sweet lord. I’m still tired. zzzzzzzz
Luckily I did not experience some of the aforementioned symptoms…I have 2 and wouldn’t mind more! 😉 BUT when they said to bring some “briefs” for post baby..they really should have told you you’d need giant sturdy grandma panties!!! LOL
I wish someone told me that miscarriages are not uncommon, that it is possible for you to throw up for nine months without being drunk or food poisoned, and that your skin will be the best it’s ever going to get.
I had the WORST skin. HUGE HUGE HUGE pimples, it was horrible!!!!! With the boys, especially!
Miscarriages are still so hush-hush 🙁
Too funny. I love all the GIFs. Very creative.
It was fun to make!
That you would have heartburn all the time! Very funny post.
glad you enjoyed it!!
ALL of these minus the feet! Not so bad on the heartburn–I’d never had it before but had it a couple times during my first pregnancy. Nobody told me anxiety and vertigo were possible symptoms is one I could add to this list! Everyone, however, talks about the women whose bodies bounce back perfectly … you’d never know they had kids. And I am SO happy for them, but so pissed at my body/self for not being one of those. Add that to the list too!
yes! The vertigo!!! I almost passed out in the mall with my first and third!!
ha! love this. (and that’s totally true about morning sickness–who came up with THAT term? morning-only sickness, yeah right!)
Lol, I agree!!
I wish someone had told me all of these things. I was so young and unprepared.
I think we’re unprepared no matter how old/young!! or maybe just too stubborn to listen!
All of these! And I was a moody, irrational, insecure wreck. Loads of fun for the husband!
I’m like that *not* pregnant!! 😉
I am dying about number 1.. that was seriously the craziest part of pregnancy for me
so glad Steph’s not alone!
How many doctors appointments there are and how bad the mood swings get.
so many dr appts!!!!
I feel you on so many of these. Especially the one where your feet grow and then don’t go back to their normal size. I already had size 9 feet. I’m almost a full size up from where I was. Because, you know, my big feet definitely needed to be bigger.
My feet got huge, but then shrunk!!! a full size smaller than pre-babies! all my shoes have inserts in them now!
Too funny! I can relate to a lot of these!! I remember when my stomach was so big I had to buy one of those handicap chairs to shave my legs in the shower, ha!
You’re ahead of me on the shaving!!! I just didn’t do it!!!
I wish someone would have told me that my hair would fall out by the handfuls after I had my baby. Ah! The horrors. I had to laugh at the morning, noon, and night sickness. I also wish I would have understood the emotions that would overcome me. I was a mess.
If I’m totally honest, I’m still an emotional mess! My kids are my everything, and it’s hard to not cry/laugh/be scared at everything they do!!
Yes to #1 and #2! Not only those, but they failed to mention that they would never go down. I went from a size 10 to a size 12 shoe over the course of 5 pregancies and boy does that hurt my ego!
Agreed!! Those beauty “after-affects” are hard to swallow!!
This is a great list!! It seems like some of the problems don’t go away after the baby is born! It is funny how much you can hate some of this but still have more than one child.
really intressting post.yet i cnt tell you what i dont know about pregnancy cz i am not a mother
You’ll have to remember this post if it ever happens, then! 🙂 Thanks for taking the time to comment!
This is so true! I wish the what to expect books were written as funny as this. I feel you about the gas and the food cravings. I ate Hooters wings 4 times a week, which my hubby loved, and jalapeno cheeseburgers for breakfast from Krystals! I also wish someone would have told me about stretch marks!
You had me at jalapeño cheeseburgers!!!!
I can relate to oh so many of these. The fact that people kept asking me if I was going to fall over when pregnant makes me think I should have given you some of my pregnancy photos for this article. Thanks for the laugh!
I can always update with yours 🙂
I also had really bad heart burn. I didn’t discover zantac until the end of it. It was awlful.
Oh yes! Heartburn is so bad the bigger baby gets! I forgot about that!
OMG some of things in your list have been said to me by my mother. This is the reason why I am afraid to get pregnant and I am considering surrogacy. Having a child is really difficult so I salute all mothers who have successfully born a child to the world and gave life.
I’ve had THREE kids, so really…it’s not THAT bad. But it’s definitely fun to make fun of AFTERWARDS!!!!!
Hahah this list is all great and so true. Thankfully I bought orthotic shoes to help my feet from growing – I’m already a size 10 so I’d really have a tough time getting shoes if they grew any more. My husband practically had to help me out of bed towards the end of it and no one ever told me that would happen 🙂
no way! Does that work!??!
Thanks for your comment on @TheMrsMuffinTop !!! Watch me on TLC this Sunday night at 11 #whatshesaid
Those gifs are just SOOO much fun! I can’t believe those last ones. I never remember being so big when I was pregnant, but I know that it happened! HA HA! I was lucky that I didn’t have morning sickness so bad.